How I Stopped Emotional Eating (Was A Problem For A Long Time)
I want to be honest. Just because someone is a coach doesn't mean they don't have their own challenges too..
I will be the first to admit I did and DO, so what I want to offer you while you read this is some KEY take home points I found very powerful in terms of controlling my impulses around food and understanding the triggers..
For a long time I would fight tooth and nail to not over eat (even healthy foods) or excessive splurges on junk for a myriad of reasons I will talk about below.. Believe me THIS will pertain to YOU to some degree.
Let's dive into this..
Some of you guys may know me as the Vegan donut guy - I won't lie. I enjoy a good vegan donut.. But what I will say and I feel this to be true for a LOT of fitness people is this..
1 - You work out really hard so you can eat poorly and avoid fat gain.
2 - If you are vegan you buy ALL the vegan junk food 'coz' supporting the cause.
3 - You would go to the store with the intent of buying clean foods, leave with some junk because it was right in your face and you were craving - bring it home and then it's right there staring you in the face.
4 - You either hit a milestone with your body/fitness, or business and you "treat yo self" excessively, chalking it up as a reward.
5 - You have a bad day for whatever reason, so you "treat yo self" because it's been rough and you need to feel better.
6 - You do excessive fasting, juice cleanses, detox protocols or things to try and force hard and fast fat loss to offset the eating.
7 - You get a plan, have the best intention to not eat junk and a few days in, relapse happens.
8 - You get a plan, stick with it as best you can, weigh yourself or look at yourself in the mirror and don't see any noticeable change and relapse happens.
9 - You have to finish the ENTIRE thing. You cannot have one cookie, in your head you have to eat it all so its done and you can move on and eat a salad.
10 - You tell yourself you will take a little break till January, enjoying this time and then focus later.
I did all of these, in some way, shape or form. Boy, did I do them..
I would train excessively hard to offset fat gain.
I would buy stuff I didn't need.
I would hit a milestone and pile down more junk than I needed.
I would even just eat too much healthy food.
Because more was better right? Either way it still would cause fat gain.
A lot of us do that, we just eat too damn much..
Wether it's boredom, or emotional, or habitual, or a combination of it all.
So I would train harder to try and offset it.
Which would then make me feel more tired, because I was pushing too hard.
Causing me to be more lethargic, less present, less patient, less creative..
And so, our business would suffer and my relationships with
Lauren, friends and family.
So how did I manage to grow beyond this?
I feel like it is something almost ALL people do in some varying degree and it hurts us. So how can you break the cycle. How can you change those compulsions?
FIRST STEP... "Less Is More"
So often we think we cannot add in a new habit, or focus or program when we are already drowning in obligations, to-do's and pressures. The reality is that, until we change something about our daily rituals, routines and habits - we WILL get the same result. Over and over..
I won't start XYZ till I am ready. The reality is - until we start, we will never grow to be competent or ready.
This is most people.
We avoid signing up for that coaching, or getting accountable to a mentor because then we know we HAVE to actually change, or our ego is on the line.
Remember a GOOD coach will actually help you simplify your life so you can bring in newer, better habits. It is our primary focus with everything we do. It is not about adding more to the plate - it is about removing all the unnecessary, unproductive things - to make way for the best focus on energy.
I had to do this when I felt like I was having a mental breakdown around our business. I HAD to change how I operated, how I interacted with people online and the time I gave people so we could actually grow.
Your body is no different.
SECOND STEP... "Biofeedback"
This was HUGE for me. As I got older I couldn't get away with eating so much food (clean or junk). I would feel overly lethargic and need caffeine. I would break out and get pimples, impacting my confidence. Which then made me avoid doing video's, so I wasn't able to get my message out as much.
I would get tons of bloating and digestive pain, to the point it often got uncomfortable, like I would POP! ..
It would massively effect my sleep, I would sweat at night and wake up all the time. Which then effected my energy, mood and focus the next day in such a bad way that I became more and more aware of how I HATED that feeling so much..
All the "negative biofeedback cues" the body screams to us to stop..
Over time the more I did it, the more I grew to hate that feeling. It got to a tipping point, to where I began to reflect on my choice - before I had even done it. I would look at the junk food and ask myself..
Do I ACTUALLY want to go through this again? Fraser, when is enough enough? And I would even say it out loud. The more I began to THINK about how I wanted to feel..
- High energy
- Clarity of mind
- Clear skin
- Deeper sleep
- Perfect digestion
- Better husband, friend, father, coach
- Healthier body (internally especially)
- More creativity
- More freakin' confidence in myself..
All the "Positive biofeedback cues". It took time to get there, but the key with this is being in the right environment. If you are in an environment conducive with being lazy and in poor health, you will get that. I talk about this in DEPTH in my ebook.
If you do not have it already, BUT have read this far then enter your email here first -https://evolvingalpha.mykajabi.com/p/FreeVideos
Email us to [email protected]
Title of email: "Ebook from emotional eating blog" and I will send it to you for free, because you took time to read this far.
That says a lot about your character to me already.
So email us, asking and I will send it for free.
I began to grow into the kind of person who valued high energy and peak state and mental health so much that I knew I had to grow. We don't often realize a LOT of our mental health issues arise from our poor eating habits and that cascades over too poor brain chemistry & thinking habits.
For me following a lot of high performing people online and having many friends like this, it FORCED me to level up. It became my "norm" too. It's why our coaching programs have closed groups and we mentor there. We work hard to generate an online space whereby you raise your baseline.
Doing it alone, often NEVER works long term.
Now it is not to say you can never have that vegan donut, or that Vegan Mac N Cheese again, but what I mean is that you don't NEED it. You don't feel this emotional pull toward it.
If you want it, you have it, enjoying a much smaller amount then finish up and feel good to move on. There is such a difference and it took me time and many, many false starts to finally get closer to that sense.
We all have that innate sense in us, that wants to nourish our body in the best possibly way. But from day one we get given junk food when we win a trophy as a child or scrap our knees. So over time we are conditioned to associate pain or reward with processed foods that ultimately hurt us and the way we think and feel.
So it is about growing to become the kind of person who doesn't 'need' it. That can take time..
THIRD STEP... "Back against the wall"
This is the most painful part .. Sadly it is what we all do.
The pain has to become so intolerable we either almost die,
go bankrupt or have a total mental breakdown. Ugh..
How often is it, that we allow things to crumble so much to the point our life is almost in ruins before we act. I was there. I did it. My poorer habits, cascaded over to poorer thinking, which then saw me do less coaching.. Less videos and posts. Less emails. Less sales calls.
But equally this moment in your life can be a catalyst for HUGE changes too. I see it as a growth point now..
We were in big trouble and I realized we had NO one to save us..
That I HAD to change.
I.. DID..NOT..HAVE..A CHOICE.
It sucks we have to get to that place, but its often needed too.
I am sure you know the feeling? Trust me - you aren't alone.
The only suggestion I can offer you outside of learning via books, videos and doing the hard work is getting me to guide you. HERE .
Our NEW strategy call system is our updated version of our custom programming system, with nutrition, training and a 60-90min deep dive 1-1 conversation with me. You also have the ability to then get follow-up weekly calls and extra guidance.
It WILL be the breakthrough you need.
I have been to the depths of hell and back many times.
With alcohol. Drugs. Food.
All the wrong things and it took REAL work to get to where I am today and I still have much more to go.
I did it by getting coaches too.
Good coaches, HAVE coaches.
It is why I am asking you that if ANY of this resonated with you, enroll with that system above. Stop spending money on Starbucks, junk food, amazon wishlist crap, getting your nails done, protein powders, takeout, clothes and other random crap that is NOT going to get you closer to a person you can be proud of.
I mean that, I know that.. Because that was ME.
I am here so if you need help (which I sense you do) make this happen.
Your back should be against the wall, because it is where your growth lies.
There is hope, but it lies in what you do today.
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